September 27: Favorite Words
*Content Warning!* I enjoy curse words, the more inventive the better. This is one of the reasons I follow Chuck Wendig’s blog religiously. No one can cuss with more aplomb and less apology.
HOWEVER. I do realize overt bad wordery is not for everyone and so I’m including this content warning. Here be rude & vulgar words. If this cussing has offended, think but this, and all is mended; that you’ve only not to read, and to this blog can pay no heed.

If this guy offends you, this post will not be a good fit.
Widdershins
Means going counter-clockwise and/or in the wrong direction. And let’s all admit right now it is SO MUCH MORE FUN to say ‘widdershins’ than plain old boring ‘counter-clockwise’.
Flapdoodle
Noun/adjective. A man whose penis does not work, with the implied addition that it’s probably from age. Therefore, it just flaps around and is useless. This is 1800s slang and it’s surprisingly harsh for such a silly sounding word!
Catawampus/Cattywampus
Adjective, meaning off-center/ out of alignment or totally whacked. Either one would be super fun to work into a book somehow. #goals
Lick-spittle
Synonym for a kiss-ass, a sycophant, a toady, a boot-licker, or the US Senate in general. There are so many different words for this, it’s obviously been around since there were people. Personally, I would like to see this one brought back into common use.
Fuckwit
According to Urban Dictionary: A person who is not only lacking in clue but is apparently unable or unwilling to acquire clue even when handed it on a plate in generous portions. I just love the way it sounds, it has a certain panache that ‘idiot’ lacks.
Pillock
Also known as a prat, or an arse. This is a delightful description of someone who’s painfully stupid, especially when James May shouts it at Richard and Jeremy. The word has has 16th century Scandinavian origins, and comes from the old English word pillicock, meaning penis. I’m informed it’s mostly harmless but I could be wrong. Still don’t think it’s as rude as saying ‘sodding’, though.
Cockwomble
A useless person, or a stream of bullshit talking with no substance. Made me laugh the first time I read it, and I’m determined to use it in a book someday. Why are there so many cool slang words for a useless person in England and not in America? Seriously.
I want to try and use Cattywampus in a story too, what an awesome word!
Haha, yes! I think it would fit into a fantasy narrative surprisingly well.
Ooh yes, so I’m definitely going to try using some of these in ever day sentences when I’m cursing someone out for being a total cockwomble! I really love cursing too haha but I try to pull it in on my blog because I have no idea who likes/doesn’t like swearing ?
It’s a delicate balance, LOL.
YES PILLOCK! I was gonna include the word Bellend in my post but I couldn’t find a good gif of James saying it and thus decided to nix it. (dang, now I wish I’d added thus and nix to my list)
There are so many good options. I remain disgruntled about how many of them are British, however! Give us stupid Yanks some of the good words, too! Haha